


Servant Of Solitude ((Nagito X Reader One Shot))

by Anuyushi



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-28
Updated: 2019-08-28
Packaged: 2020-10-01 22:09:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,141
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20421065
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Anuyushi/pseuds/Anuyushi
Summary: Is this the end of the world? How can we possibly fight the evil? The evil... Within our hearts.I can't remember anything, but these strange kids claimed I killed a great many people, and now they want to kill me too, because i'm almost 'a demon'I begged for my life, but I can't wrap my head around something. Who is this guy? Why do I feel like I know him?A continuation of "Tame Us"♚[© 2017 | @Anuyushi]♛





	Servant Of Solitude ((Nagito X Reader One Shot))

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Tame Us ((Nagito X Reader One Shot))](https://archiveofourown.org/works/10501254) by [Anuyushi](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Anuyushi/pseuds/Anuyushi). 

What's this? I feel... Warm. I don't like this feeling, not when I feel so alone as well. Why do I feel warm? I moved to wrap my arms around my body then stopped. What's... This on my hands? That can't be. It... What is this? What...  
Why can't I remember? No... No!  
No no no why... I shouldn't have looked at my hands. I shouldn't have seen the horror of the thick blood soaking my skin.   
This wasn't my blood, was it? It couldn't be, because I wasn't hurting. No matter how much I tried to recall what happened, my whole mind went blank.   
"Well well well!" Laughter rang in my ears. I looked around but I couldn't even pinpoint where it came from.   
My breath caught in my throat when I saw the scene around me. What... Kind of nightmare was this? I could smell death all around me. Death, bodies, surrounding all around me. I pulled back from the grip one of them had on me, doing my best not to look right into his large, terrified eyes.   
That's why I felt warm, wasn't it? How... How horrible!  
"Look at them."  
"Who is that?"  
More voices echoed around. I pulled myself to my feet, wiping my hands on my already dirty clothes.   
"I have no idea." Someone giggled.   
What kind of monster did all this? "Who's there?" I choked back, almost tasting the air. I had... To get out of here. I stepped over the body before me, doing my best not to step in any of the blood but at some spots, that wasn't possible and I ended up getting my shoes covered in the sticky red. Why... Was I the only one alive?   
Well, that wasn't entirely true, right? Those voices... Once I got passed the horrific scene, I let myself crumble to my knees, gasping for fresh air. How long had I been there? Why couldn't I remember anything? I don't even recall my own name.   
"Are you here?" I called out. "If you are, please help me!" I wait, and wait, for a response from the strangers but nothing made a sound.   
Just then, something sounded to be coming closer. The ground rattled as heavy steps approached from somewhere unknown. I let out a sigh of relief, lowering my head. "Thank you... Please, help m-" I stopped myself, my eyes landing on a strange machine. One of it's eyes glowed a bright red as the other was a simple black. It seemed to be staring into my soul with it's... Odd smile. I fell back, then made an attempt to crawl to my feet and run but I never had the chance when it's arms tightened around my body. I wanted to scream but I was too exhausted from what I woke up too, and who could help me anyway?  
"Why would we help someone like you?" A voice whispered from inside the machine. It sounded a lot like a speaker, then they began to laugh. "It was just way too much fun to see you go berserk!" The voice sounded like a male, then someone else came on. A girl, this time. "That wasn't cute at all. You weren't supposed to do that yet. If you do all the work..."  
The voice switched again to another boy I hadn't heard before.  
"Then who would fear us?" The boy muttered, paused, then spoke again. "Our paradise won't be complete if you do that again. So you better stop that and let us handle it!"   
I closed my eyes tightly, hearing the scolding from the people I couldn't even see. If I didn't know better, they almost sounded like... Children. "Are you going to kill me?" I forced out, not exactly wanting to hear the answer. One of the children burst out laughing as the robot started up, moving back in the direction towards the bodies. 

"Nah. You're not one of our targets, and you looked to be pretty strong. We're going to bring you back here and play a little game." The girl cooed. Game? Do I even want to know? I struggled against the grip but it was futile against the strength of a machine. Eventually I stopped trying and let me carry me away. I was being moved through the streets of the city, the only thing I could smell was death in the air, everywhere I went. Why was there so much death? How did all of this happen and how come it didn't happen to me?

A bright light shine over the street just then, making me turn around to a large tower before me. A spotlight from it was emitting in my direction. "Here already?" A voice wondered from the robot. The gates before the building swung open on their own, opening a path inside. The robot staggered forward clumsily, it's strangely proportioned body seemed to be giving it trouble. Once it passed through the gates, I was suddenly dropped, having to rt my footing quickly. I was tempted to run but the gates had already slammed shut before I was dropped, trapping me I inside. Looking around revealed there was nowhere for me to escape too. I would have to face them, wouldn't I? The front doors slowly opened, and even without the voices speaking to me, I was pretty sure I knew what I was supposed to do. Catching my breath, I stepped up, closing the doors behind me and entering a large room. 

A group of laughing welcomed me into the shadows and one by one, lights lit up the room where five children stood in the center of the room. Small they may be, I could sense malice from each of them. One of the boys began to come closer and I instinctively tensed up. His wide grin seemed somewhat proud as he crossed his arms. "It's you! It's really you!" His eyes sparkled as he looked back to the others. "What do we do with them?"

"We can't kill them, obviously." Another boy with blue hair rolled his eyes. "But it's too dangerous to let 'em wander the streets again."

"Dangerous? Didn't you see what they could do?" A girl with punk hair in ponytails pout. "Plus they're almost an adult! They can take care of themselves!"

A child in the middle cleared her throat. "Now now." She set her hands on her lap. "There's no need to fight. I have the perfect plan. Of course it's too dangerous out of the street, but it'd be dangerous to all the children out there if we let them walk free. So... Let's play!" She smiled excitedly. I felt a shiver go up my spine and scanned the room for an escape route. I didn't want to play with these children, or have anything to do with them.

"Before I play.." I began slowly. "What do you guys keep talking about? I can't remember anything before I woke up a little bit ago. I can't even remember my own name." I rubbed my head, feeling a light headache. Humoring them for now would be best before I can escape, and not getting them mad would work in my favor, but I still had no idea what was going on. 

One boy who had stayed quiet the whole time opened his mouth but it took him a second to actually say something. In a somewhat deep voice, he took the state while looking to his feet. "You were super scary." I recall hearing the voice in the robot but I didn't except it to come from such a small child. 

"We put a chip in your head but it messed up before we even used it." He pointed to his head, covered by a brown mask while he tilted it at the same time. "The electric thingies from it hurt your brain and made you lose your memory-"

"And I guess the pain was wicked bad because you went crazy and slaughtered everyone around you without a single hesitation!" The first boy interrupted with a laugh. "I can't believe you don't remember doing all that!"

"I didn't!' I argued, shaking my head. No way I would do something like that, even if I was in pain! Why did they act like they didn't know me then, if they really did put some chip in my brain? 

The girl that appeared to be the leader moved forward, her wheelchair rolling closer silently. "You must be confused." She spoke gently once she was before me. "I'll explain." The girl looked to the others before she turned back to me. "We're going to make a child's paradise so we gotta kill all the adults, except a bunch of them teamed up and is hiding somewhere in the city." She pout, her cheeks turning red in anger. "So we put a chip in your brain and hopefully they would take you in and we could find where they were then activate it so you'd become a killing machine!" She ended with a smile, small hands held together over her legs.  
"Monaca is so smart!" The girl with pink hair giggled. "Don't you love how sweet she is?"  
I felt my legs get wobbly, struggling to stand. A... Killing machine? Did I really.. Do all that? But I would never hurt someone! "Why me? Why didn't I just die too?" I dropped to my hands and knees, not being able to control the stream of salty tears rolling down my cheeks.  
"We totally forgot to introduce ourselves!" The other girl cried out, completely ignoring me. I clamped my eyes shut, lowering my head.   
"We're the Warriors of Hope!" They all shout at once. I felt a hand on my head and slowly looked up to Monaca, a gentle smile on her face. "It's too bad." She began. "You would've been helpful to us but now that the chip broke, we don't need you anymore. So let's start the game." She looked back to the three waiting boys. "I want her to be sent back into the city. And make sure to send a lot of bears after her!"  
Bears.. I quickly felt fear rising in my gut. They wanted to hunt me? I didn't... Want to be slaughtered like the others! "Wait!" I called out before Monaca left. She looked back curiously and I swallowed my pride, letting out a sigh. "I'll... Do anything. Please don't kill me. I don't want to end as just another dead body and people won't even remember my name." I sniffed, wiping my eyes dry. The boy with the blue hair hummed, looking to the others. "A servant? It's a pretty pathetic grovel but I wouldn't mind being pampered."  
All the children looked to Monaca and await her response. The girl tapped her chin, then suddenly clapped her hands. "Wonderful! The one we have now is kinda slow, right? Should we dump him?"  
"Please don't." A new voice came from the corner of the room. Everyone turned in the direction to observe a tall male stand up. I hadn't even noticed he was there the whole time, his appearance made my heart race for a moment. As he stepped closer, a chain from around his neck dragged on the ground, causing an ear piercing noise to echo through the large room. The children didn't seem that bothered by it though. "When did you get there?" The boy with orange hair set his hands on his waist. "When did you get there?" He repeated . "You're so creepy!" The boy scolded. The male chuckled sheepishly, tilting his head. Looking over his features, he reminded me of a twig. Thin, tall, his hair was wildly messy. "Sorry. Did I mess up again?"  
Monaca moved her wheelchair forward, approaching him carefully then gave his sleeve a tug. "Hey, hey. I got a question." She began. His eyes widened for a moment and gave her a grin. "Anything for you, Monaca. What is it?"  
"You're almost a demon, aren't you?"  
At her question, I could see him tense up but his face didn't reveal any fear. "Yes, I am. But not yet." He replied slowly.   
"D-Demon?" I swallowed my crying back and pulled myself back up.   
"Hey, you're almost a demon too!" The boy with the mask pointed at me.   
"Quiet, Jataro." Monaca waved her hand. As she spoke, the boy closed his mouth quickly. "They aren't demons yet. Aren't they so cute?" She pulled the boy down and hugged him tightly, laughing to herself. "So cute how you listen to everything we say!" As she let him go, she made sure to push him back, causing him to stumble and lose his footing, falling to the ground. "I don't wanna kill you yet 'cuz you're being good." After she spoke to him, which I would only assume was their current servant, Monaca looked back to me, catching me in eye contact. Those eyes... I shivered and looked away. "And you, (y/n), you can stay here too. Alrighty? He'll show you around. You better be a good servant." She giggled. Was that my name? I wasn't sure myself, but it sounded right.  
If that was my only chance to live, perhaps i'll take it for now. But I couldn't help but feel somewhat guilty. Why do I get the chance to live when I was the one that killed all those people? I had to shake the thoughts away. I know I wouldn't do something like that. The male approached, holding out his hand. I examined him a little more before I chose to take it. Even his hand was slender and somewhat bony. It felt like it would break at the slightest squeeze so I placed my hand atop his, careful not to actually take hold. His fingers tightened around my hand and be began to walk away, taking the lead to pull me deeper into the strange tower. 

What... Have I gotten myself into?  
The hallways seemed to grow darker and darker. I could see odd shapes in corners and strange eyes staring right into me. I didn't feel safe here... Not at all. I gripped onto his hand tighter, as if a weak looking guy like him could actually protect me from whatever lurked in the shadows.   
"Don't worry." He suddenly muttered out, the smooth sounding voice calmed my nerves but I couldn't listen to that advice while being trapped here. "They won't hurt you, or me. We're on the side of the Warriors Of Hope, aren't we?" He ended with a small laugh. "I guess it's a good thing we aren't demons yet, or we wouldn't stand a chance."  
"Demons?" That word again. I wasn't a demon at all so why...?  
The servant blinked, pausing for a moment before smiling. "Ah, you don't know yet. The Warriors Of Hope want to destroy all the demons so the world can become a children's paradise. You could say the demons... Are adults."  
Hearing this information, I thought back to myself. Was I an adult? I wasn't a small child like they were, for sure. But I don't even remember my actual age. All I know now was my real name, which those children knew for some reason. If there really was a chip in my head, how bad was that malfunction to make me forget my own age?  
"Oh, how rude of me." He rubbed his neck shyly with his free hand. "My name is Nagito Komaeda."  
I felt like I knew that name somewhere, but from where? This annoying feeling of forgetfulness was driving me mad!  
"So what happened with you?" I moved closer to stand beside him, letting the conversation tune out all the shining red eyes watching from the shadows.

"Not that different from yours actually. Besides the massacre and memory part."   
I frowned at his joking response, and Nagito awkwardly cleared his throat. "Don't worry about it. Even if you had done that, it wasn't your fault." He waved it off so casually, as if it wasn't a big deal; but I could still feel the blood soaked in my hands. My clothes still painted the color of death.  
Nagito began to slow down, turning his head to face a dark door against the wall. He released my hand and I felt a wave of chill over my skin. "Here. I hope it's not a problem." His voice grew gentle as he pushed open the door. "To be a servant, you must look the part." As he said that, he raised up the chain around his neck, and I realized exactly what Nagito meant. I needed to wear a chain, didn't I?   
With a heavy sigh, I held back my complaints and dragged myself into the room. It was pretty well lit with candles, and reminded me of a celebrity dressing room.  
There was a fold up changing wall with clothing draped over it on the left side of the room, hangers hung everywhere, making the walls barely visible. Among the mess, I spot a stool in front of a pink vanity. I sucked in a breath, feeling the memories radiating off that. Nagito paused for a moment, then entered the room. I watched him move towards a large trunk on the far end of the room. He leaned down, pulling the top open. He searched the contents then pulled out a chain, at the end... A collar, much like what he was wearing now. If I wear that, will I be stuck here forever? I only begged so I wouldn't die, but I planned to escape. How could I do that if I had a heavy chain around my neck?  
As Nagito rose, I inhaled, straightening myself. I'll... Find a way to get it off soon. So... I couldn't despair yet!

I closed my eyes and felt the chilling metal tighten around my neck.   
Nagito's fingers moved slowly, locking the chain on then adjusting it carefully. Once I felt it was on, I opened my eyes, looking down to the bounds. They... Were so heavy, I felt the stress on my neck, then wrapped my arm around the chain slowly, having my arm take on some of the weight.   
"I can see it in your eyes." Nagito suddenly muttered. When I looked up to his face, he was smirking. "You're confused. I wish you'd remember, (y/n). If that happened.." He trailed off, then chuckled. "I can't kiss you... Until you remember."   
I felt my chest grow tight. Why would he say that? I had no idea who he even was! Cheeks inflamed, I narrowed my eyes. "I don't want any kiss from someone like you."  
He tensed up for a moment, then let out a sigh. "Ah, of course. It was silly of me to expect you to remember just by that. You were the one who kissed me first... After all."   
Before I could ask, he pushed passed me, shutting the door behind him. I looked in the direction he went then looked around the room a little more. What was that about?   
Maybe... I could look around and find some memories here.   
I moved towards the chest he had opened, lowering myself to my knees and pulling my arm from the chain so I could dig around. There was many more chain collars, along with various clothes. a strange sickly green color crossed my vision and I pulled it up. Something flashed in the back of my mind but I... couldn't remember. Why couldn't I... What was this? I spread the article out, brushing my hand over the soft fabric. A jacket... It was a jacket. Why was it here, and why was it important?   
Something kept nagging at me, but why couldn't I...?  
Small red cubes covered the shoulder, and it appeared the bottom was ripped- No, the whole jacket itself looked like a glitch.   
With a heavy sigh, I pulled the jacket up and draped it over myself, pulling my arms through the sleeves. Hopefully the children wouldn't mind if I wore this, just for a little while. I'm not sure why, but it felt important to me.   
Looking back the the chest, I couldn't find anything else that seemed familiar so I closed the lid and rose, fixing the jacket to make it sit comfortably.   
My eyes landed on the vanity against the wall, so I moved closer, pulling all the miscellaneous clothes down and clearing it off. I caught myself in the mirror, jacket on my body, this felt so natural, but I swear I had never seen it before. I forced a smile, but it was only a fake, seeing my clothes still stained with blood.   
While I was here, I should get rid of these. I didn't care much, pulling a shirt and jeans out of the closest stack that looked to fit, replacing the items and adding the jacket back on once again. After looking in the mirror, my whole body appeared more dark. The clothes themselves were bright and colorful, perfect for children. But on me, they felt dangerous somehow. I shook my head, pulling my eyes from the mirror. Why... Did Nagito leave me here anyway? What does he want me to do? I pulled open a vanity drawer, finding it stuffed with objects. I pulled out the one on top, a small pink bow. It.. Didn't ring any bells, so I set it aside. Thinking back on it, it was the same kind of bow that the girl with the pink hair was wearing. Was this her vanity?   
I pulled out another object more carefully. This one seemed to be a photograph, but only one person looked familiar.   
That was.. Nagito. He was smiling around the group of people that seemed to be enjoying a party. A girl close to the camera was grinning with the peace sign, as well as two guys around a table and a smaller looking child only appearing to be only a few feet from Nagito. It was a little hard to see his expression. but Nagito didn't seem to be smiling. in fact, his arms were crossed as he stared directly at the camera.   
As I looked closer, I notice the familiar jacket that was currently around me. So this... I looked down at the jacket, using my free hand to graze the fabric. Why did he leave this here? Did Nagito... Want me to find this?   
What is this photo? What does any of this mean? The more I looked at it, the more I felt some sort of ache in my heart. But why? Why did I feel like I knew them? I set the photo down and had to back away from the vanity before my head hurt even more.   
"What's going on!" I had to cry out, releasing all my stress in a single yell before crumbling to my knees. "What did I wake up too? What... I don't... Understand." Unable to stop the tears from rolling down my cheeks, I let myself break little by little until I couldn't cry any longer, my cheeks stinging from the salty water.   
I heard the door crack open and quickly sniffed, wiping my eyes. "Who's there?" When I looked back, I saw Nagito standing there. A patient, yet somewhat smug smile painted over his face. "Just me. The children are asking for you." He stepped inside then suddenly froze. I saw his eyes widen for a second before he crossed his arms, looking into the hallway. "Umm... Apparently they wish to welcome you."  
He turned away and I thought for a moment, I could see a look of hesitation in his eyes. What was this emotion I was feeling? I stood, approaching him carefully. Why do I feel like... You're connected to my past? I past I can't remember?   
Before I came closer, a shooting pain coursed through my head.   
"Here. I expected something like this would happen and I prepared sticks. Whoever gets the one with the red mark gets cleaning duty."  
I recalled those words, but who said them? I shut my eyes, trying to cling to the memory. Sticks... Why was that important?   
"Yea you and Nagito were pretty close. Must be hard to find out he's a psychopath. But hey, better to find out now than later."  
No... That's wrong. I shook my head. Why was that wrong? Nagito blinked, waving his hand in front of my face. "(y/n)?" He spoke my name. I felt more and more beginning to come back to me as I moved closer to him. He didn't move when I stood right before him, and I.. Slowly began to inch my hand closer, until I rest my fingers on his shoulder, skin cold as ice. "I think I remember." I muttered out.  
"I see how you look at him. Love is a beautiful thing."  
"You're-" I looked to the ground. Nagito tilt his head, chuckling quietly. "I'm just a lowly servant." As he started to back away, I lurched forward quickly, wrapped my arms around him. I felt myself about to cry once again as I buried my face in his shirt. "How could I have forgotten?" I choked back. "How could I have forgotten how you made me feel? It's... It's not fair!" I tightened my grip as I felt him tense up.   
I had forgotten it all. How I was there... I was on that island, I was in the game as well. I used to be... An ultimate.  
"Nagito was my friend. So I should be the one to do this. Stop turning me away from helping someone I care for."  
I had said those words. He... Was right. All that time ago, I was the one who had kissed him first. All that time ago, after he had tried to commit the first murder, the others had tied him up. I.. Went to feed him and I... Realized my feelings. Nagito must have noticed me right away but he didn't say a word because... He didn't want to push me away. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."  
"Don't tell me... You're not falling for this piece of garbage, are you?"  
"I..." I closed my eyes as tight as I could. My heart was racing and i'm sure he could feel that. "I love you, really. I'm sorry I forgot. There's no excuse-"  
"(y/n), (y/n)-" His tone changed suddenly to the one he had back on the island. "It took you this long? Do you remember now?" After a pause, he began to laugh. "Of course not. You only remember a little past the first trial, don't you? No doubt you don't remember the fifth trial; mine." He moved his hand over my chin and make me look up to his face. His eyes held something they didn't before. Some kind of... Power. "You weren't supposed to be there, you know. You weren't a remnant. You were there all because of me, because we were together at the school, I refused to enter the program without you. But we forgot about eachother, and started all over. But even then.." His grin changed to a gentle smile. "We still ended up together anyway. How can... Even without our memories, we're still drawn to each other. Loving someone like me."  
I let out a soft laugh. We found each other... For a third time. I didn't hesitant, pulling the servant closer and catching him in a kiss, just like in the island. This time, he kissed back, unlike how he had frozen in surprise before.   
What makes me- us, a beacon of hope? Is it really because we're ultimates? Our talents didn't help us find each other... It was our hearts. Is that what makes a beacon? Should the strength of our hearts be shared with the world?  
A world... covered in blood. But we can stop it, can't we?   
We can...  
End this despair.  
No matter how long it takes to escape here, i'll endure it until we're free and help the world recover. That's what my heart is telling me now.   
It took a while, but I remember it all.  
I had gone to Hope's Peak Academy where I met Nagito and over time, we became a couple until the world was hit with Despair and he, as well as the rest of the class became remnants. Only I... Wasn't one; because I hadn't gone to school that day after getting sick. The day Junko took over. I still stayed by Nagito's side, even when his actions hurt me. Until... The whole class was taken by the Future Foundation for the Neo World Program. Our memories were wiped, and I forgot about our time at Hope's Peak. I... didn't need to go in too, but Nagito had put up such a fight, I... Began to beg to go with to stay with him and Future Foundation finally agreed, which explains my... late arrival into the class.  
I forgot all about him... And we started over, only to fall in love once again inside the game until he died... I knew the truth behind his death, because I was the only one he told; so before the plan was carried out, I destroyed myself as well, waiting in the very room he was preparing to die in and let myself be killed as well. It probably made the whole trial seem obvious what happened but then we woke up from the game.  
After that, it got a little fuzzy and I found myself waking up in a bloodied road. In between that time, what happened?  
All I can think is once we awoke from the program after the resurrection, I was kidnapped by the Warriors of Hope and implanted with the chip and sent out into the streets of the city where there was a malfunction that caused me to kill everyone around me as well as remove all my memories. The pain must have caused me to pass out. With what i've found.. The jacket and the photo, I began to remember. This... Has to be the whole story.  
As the kiss broke, Nagito tilt his head, fluffy hair falling over his face. "So you're wearing my jacket. I want you to keep that, okay? Until we break free."  
Right after he finished, I heard a call in the hallway as one of the kids approached. I flinched, quickly pulling away. "We'll break out of here, got it?" I offered a grin and hurried out the door.  
We'll get out of here and i'll never let myself forget about him again because after all, we're both fighting for our own hope.  
And for the hope of the world.


End file.
